The Real Cause Of GlobAL Warming

Researchers have discovered the true cause of GlobAL warming this morning:

Hell hath no fury like a Live Earth Concert scorned!

Scientists at We Don't Really Know But We'll Report Like We Know Labs, an independent research laboratory, have just released visual evidence of what they claim to be the real cause for global warming. The head researcher on the project, Ly Ying Prik, said of the evidence:

Dis da howtest we seen Aw Gowe since da erection fiasco of 2000. Gwain of sawt to be taken wit evidence b/c we onwy been studying Aw Gowe fow a fwew yeaws & accuwate wecowds of Aw Gowe onwy been kep sin 1998.

Proponents of the report have said that this new evidence will be a momentous step in the battle to combat global warming... or climate change... or cow burping... or whatever it is that is actually causing whatever it is that is actually going. Some of these researchers also think the genetically defective way a Liberal brain is wired also may lead to global warming or believing in global warming:

Fear & Self-Loathing In Las Cabellas

Opponents of the research have offered these countering pieces of evidence:

I cry when animals die b/c they remind me of a puppy I had once that was run over by an SUV, so obviously the environment is important to me. - Eliza Beth Green, Monterrey, Calif.

Shut up, stupid. That's like so like a photoshop of Al Gore, yo. - Haley Harris, Burlington, Vt.

You're a Nazi. If you don't believe in global warming than you probably rape babies. - Jason Giltzberg , Greenwich Village, NYC, NY

Bush lied, 1000s died in Iraq. Bush lied so his oil company CEO cronies can harm the environment with their Oilapalooza & corporations raping of Mother Gaia. - Harmony Meadows, Corvallis, Ore.

I'm like 40 now & I sweat a lot more than when I was a child & the world was idyllic b/c I'm holding onto some lost Eden myth in my head when in actuality my childhood idyllic world was nothing but stickball games on a concrete street & I didn't notice the heat b/c I was 10 & could run all day hopped up on soda & ice cream anyway. - Joey Antonini, Brooklyn, NY

I don't care that it snowed in Buenos Aires for the 1st time in 89 years. That's not "proof" that the globe isn't getting warmer b/c Bush's Weather Machine propagated by the NSA & wiretapping of environmental activists thatch huts could have easily created that snow by stealing it off Antarctic glaciers & dropping the snow from black ops helicopters that go undetected & unseen b/c of reverse engineered alien spacecraft that was also helped to be built by Bush's cronies in the Illimunati & the banking world. Oh yeah, I don't know how but Israel's treatment of the Palestinians causes global warming too. Free Tibet! - 'Peace Prophet,' San Francisco, Calif.

Yes, I will from now on listen to science experts such as Camoron Diaz, Melissa Eartheridge & Leonardo Di Caprius chastise me for burning fossil fuel & heating my apartment when they're able "offset their carbon footprints" of their Leer & Gulfstream jets, their multi-roomed mansions & ridiculous energy bills which amounts to nothing more than buying off their guilt of these excesses. I would just love to be able to leave my "carbon footprint" in Lieonardo Di Caprick's ass by breaking my foot of in it.

Viva le SUVs!

Viva le fossil fuel burning!